I thought that today I might delve deeper into a couple of points that I covered in my previous posting Why I don’t like growth charts and leaving my sick baby at home https://justanothermummyblog.wordpress.com/2012/05/02/why-i-dont-like-growth-charts-and-leaving-my-sick-baby-at-home/. Writing about the role of the man and the woman in child rearing got me thinking about how much the world has changed. Can women really have it all and what happens to the men when we do?
When I was growing up myself and all of my friends had stay at home mums, it was odd for someones mother to work. Flash forward about 15 years and now I find myself in completly the opposite situation, it’s not the “norm” for a mother to be able to stay at home full time, infact I would go so far as to say that at least ninety percent of the mums I know have gone back to work at least one day a week. Now going back to work is not necessairily a choice that we as mummys have made, usually it’s more of a necessity, in order to keep the house, car and everything else we NEED to go back to work. Luckily for me I have gone back three days a week which I feel now is a pretty good balance. I still get to spend more of the week with my little monkey than without but also have the “break” that is going to work and spending time as an adult not just a mummy. Had you spoken to me prior to going back to work I’m 100% sure that I would have said that I wanted to stay home full time, however, after being forced back to work, if I am blessed with any other children I shall be giving a different answer. I’m not ashamed to say that now I like going to work…probably more than I did pre-baby. As a parent it’s really difficult, as I said before in the work, family, me balance https://justanothermummyblog.wordpress.com/2012/04/30/the-work-family-me-balance/ to find any time to yourself when you’re at home with your children, going to work gives me that time, I can excercise my brain and be myself.
The obstical that my husband and I are coming up against with both of us working is who stays home with the baby when he’s sick? The logical way for us to work this is that we share the responsibility. I do one day, he does the next. Now this may or may not be a bit sexist but it seems odd for him to be calling work to say he can’t come in cause he has to stay home and look after the baby, even to me, and I would like to think of myself as open minded. We are so used to it being a womans job to look after the children that a man doing it is somewhat alien. But it isn’t alien is it? I have the good fortune to say that my huband is a wonderful man…he has done his fair share of everything Isaac…the 3am feeds, exploding nappies, sleepless nights, teething…the list goes on. Surely this is what as equals we can now expect from our significant others. Raising a child is so stressful that there is nothing more important than the support of your significant other and I am glad that I live in a world where it isn’t tabboo for me to say, I’m bushed, would you mind taking over?