Isaac is at his child minders today, as it is Halloween I thought it would be nice if he dressed up for the occasion! I didn’t want a scary child so I thought I’d go for something cute! He has a magnet that he loves on our fridge, it is of Totoro, if you don’t know who he is here is a little pic for you:
When Roy and I found out we were expecting it made me think of all the times as a child that I insisted on sleeping in mum and dads bed…I’m ill, I had a nightmare…the list goes on. We decided that if, in the next eighteen years, we wanted to get any sleep at all we would need to replace our falling apart bed, and it would need to be with a bigger one!
A nightmare with Dreams later we had a Next bed and King Size mattress…super comfortable, I am really, really happy with our bed.
So, if you know me you’ll know that when it comes to my baby I’m pretty snap happy! You can imagine my horror when on Sunday the camera on my stupid Iphone decided that it no longer wanted to be a camera any more…livid…oh, the wonderful opportunities that I’ve missed and could have immortalised for ever!
I find that since having Isaac, more than ever, I am obsessed with taking photos. It drivesRoymad…”Why can’t you just enjoy the moment?”…I was thinking about that last night, why can’t I just enjoy the moment? I think that the answer is that I don’t want the moment to end. When a moment is over then you still have your memory, but eventually memories fade and I don’t want to loose any of my time with Isaac and I certainly do not want to forget any of it. Photos are the remedy for me, I can nostalgically look back over where we have come from, and more than that, I can share it! Continue reading →
As you may or may not know Isaac has had croup and a cold recently so he’s not been his usual chirpy self. He’s also been a bit, how shall I put it…willful with his eating recently, at the moment I’m not sure if its the cold or growing up. Regardless of the cause eating has been a bit stressful of late. For lunch he used to love sandwiches and now they mostly end up on the floor in a mangled mess! He seems to be turning his nose up at everything we offer him. My husband and I decided to offer him warm meals like mash etc for lunch and dinner as he always ate a good dinner before and after the fifth spoonful of what ever it was that we put in front of him we were met by Isaac screaming at the top of his lungs and throwing himself back on his booster seat in protest. Now I expected instant results from changing his meals to something he would like, I guess I’m so used to everything being instant that I projected that onto him too, ignoring that he is in fact a little person with his own mind. After waving a spoon in his face for what seemed like hours we gave up and went on to desert….which he obviously ate.
Maybe there was no instant fix for this? It was reading the blog I mentioned below that I thought about what I was doing to his meals. I’d been expecting Isaac to go at my pace, but it was his meal so shouldn’t we be going at his?
Next dinner time we made sure that we all sat down together, with the same meal, lasagna. I put on the telly…Isaac isn’t allowed to watch much TV, nothing against TV in general I would just rather that he played. Any way the TV was on as a distraction so there wasn’t too much pressure on him and that we weren’t staring at him, waiting for him to take a bite. He did, in fact he ate it all up and then asked for some of mine. We tried again the next night and the same thing happened, all of his dinner gone. We used to eat together as a family when he was being weaned to help him gain confidence but this had some what fallen by the way side when I wen’t back to work and it was harder to get meals ready for when Isaac needs to eat. I guess that I had underestimated how important it was to him to a) feed himself and b) eat with mummy and daddy.
From now on I’m making a conscious effort to go at his pace and not mine. He is after all still little and has a lot of growing up to do!
So to finish up here are my tips for eating with baby, the things that have worked for me:
Try to eat together as much as possible, it useful for them to see you eating
Try to give them what you’re eating as much as possible, they just want to copy mummy and daddy, they may surprise you…Isaac did when he at a bowl and a half of butter chicken curry and loved it.
Don’t worry about the mess, pop a table cloth on the floor and let them play with the food if they want to, it’s how they learn.
If they want to feed themselves let them, they know when they’re full and wont keep shoveling!
Try not to get stressed or make meals into a big deal, it certainly didn’t work for me and just made me a grumpy mummy!
What do you do when you feel like the worst mother in the whole world? Talk to other mothers! More and more I’m realising how important it is to have a good support network of other mummies and friends who are going through the same things as you, not only for baby having children of a similar age to grow and develop with but for your own piece of mind!
So here is my tragic tale, another morning of woe! Isaac was up early today so we had a bit of a play while I got ready for work, all very nice. Isaac is now growing in his independence and wants to walk all the time. I carried him to the car…we have to cross a road so obviously I don’t want him walking across it! We got to the car, me and one extremely wriggly little boy! He was squirming so much that I couldn’t get to my car keys to open the car door so I popped him standing on the floor and held his hand and with my free hand searched for my keys. While I was looking in my bag he wriggled his chubby little hand free and started to wander along the pavement…just two little steps but he was out of reach and lost his footing. I could see him falling to the floor slowly but I couldn’t get to him. How could I let him let go of my hand like that? I should have held onto him despite all of his protestations.
His little head bumped on the ground and he started to scream. I rushed over and swept him up but I don’t suppose any amount of mummy cuddles will make up for letting him fall like that. He developed, very quickly, a big, angry, purple bruise on his forehead and grazed his nose. I grabbed sleepy tiger (smelly, disgusting and the cure for all ailments) and the wails petered out. What was I going to do now? Did he hit his head hard enough to get concussed? Did he have gravel in it?
I decided it would be best to put him into his car seat and carry on to the childminders. She opened the door to a bruised little boy and a rather distressed looking mother. Between us we cleaned him up and off he toddled, slightly battered but fairly happy. I gave him a huge hug goodbye, it’s so much harder to let go of them when you feel like you’ve failed them and caused them pain. For the second morning in a row I got into the car and sobbed. I cried all the way to work…in case you were wondering that is a 45 minute drive. Arrived at work puffy eyed and blotchy and called someone I knew would understand…my mum (my husband was already at work so I’ll have to call him later and say how sorry I am and what a hideous wife and mother he chose to spend his life with). I’m sure it sounds very much like I am being melodramatic but when you hurt your little one you really do feel like the world is ending. Every scenario you play out goes crazy in your head, what if the childminder calls social services to tell them that I’m a bad mum and they agree; what then?? In reality I’m pretty sure that social services have much bigger problems to deal with than that and if this had happened to one of my mummy friends I would tell them to stop being silly and that they’re great mummies but it’s all different when it happens to you isn’t it?
Having been at work for a couple of hours now, most of that time thinking about what happened this morning, I’ve realised that I’m just one of a million mums that from time to time feels like they didn’t do enough and aren’t good enough. We really do all feel like this from time to time, its not even confined to being a mother, EVERYONE feels like this at some point in their life, some more often than others. You have to take the rough with the smooth and chalk it all up to experience, everything is a learning curve…today I learnt that I will never, ever leave the house without my car keys already in my hand ever, ever again!